(no subject)
May. 11th, 2007 10:14 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
bookish_dragonPart One
Story Or Series Title: A Bride for the Dark Lord
Fandom: Still no Harry, only an Heir to the throne of Whining.
Culprit Author's Name: CorruptedBeauty666. Repeat offender.
Full Name (plus titles if any): ---. I shit you not. She is given no name. I’ll just call her the Bride.
Full Species(es): Mirror-Sue. She looks how you want her to look.
Hair Color (include adjectives): None given. So it’s blonde.
Eye Color (include adjectives): None given. So they’re blue.
Unusual Markings/Colorations: None given. A plate in her head. A bunch of annoying OC-friends.
Special Possessions (if any): None given. She can’t have that sword.
Annoying Origin: Two Death Eater parents, named ---.
Annoying Connections To Canon Characters: BFF with Draco. Has the Dark Lord propose to her.
Annoying Special Abilities: Lord V can’t get into her mind, and that has him puzzled. Potty-mouth.
Other Annoying Traits: Part of a pranking-ring at Slytherin. Snape does not approve. Pansy-bashing. Maintaining that she is not special, which usually means they are.
Please include a small sample of the worst of this story: I’m sorry, I can’t do this anymore. So I bribed Julia into having Yattara do it for me.
Yattara: "I will kill Julia for this."
Me: "You’ve been saying that for years. Get on with it. I need a break." *shoves Yatti into the fic.*
"Do not call me Yatti!"
I stuck out my tongue in a very childish gesture and before I could say anything a voice shouted up "Draco, honey, it's time to go so why don't you and [The Bride] come downstairs."
Even Malfoy's parents are afraid to speak her name.
I started to laugh hysterically. Draco stuck his tongue out at me just as I had a minute ago, yeah I know, we're real mature.
Mortals are weird. Mortal pairing rituals are even weirder. How do you survive as a species?
"Let's go, Drakie" I teased him.
"Whatever soon-to-be, Dark Lady." I made a face at the stupid title. As we quickly made our way down, with Draco filling me in on the whole Pansy situation and how his parents thought that she and him were perfect for each other and how if they and Pansy got their way that those two might actually have to get married.
I do not see how those two are not perfect for each other. He is arrogant, and so is she. What better way to be when you are better than the rest?
By the time we got into the den which was where our parents were, Draco had me in a much better mood.
"Hello Love" Mrs. Malfoy said as she gave me kisses on both cheeks.
Love, Dark Lady and [The Bride]. *shakes head.*
"Mister and Mrs. Malfoy, it is pleasure to see you again" I purred out.
I know what you're thinking, and yes I can be as much of a suck up as anyone else, and I do it even better then most.
I doubt that. Demons, those can suck up. You are a mere amateur.
Mr. Malfoy gave me a nod and continued to talk to my father in a very hushed tone. They were both sitting in the two chairs facing the fireplace having a conversation that looked like it was very important and in that case was probably something for Voldemort. You know, I have to face it... they have no other lives then their dear Lord Voldemort, it's pathetic when you get down to it.
Devotion to a highly intelligent, wrathful and powerful force of evil? I feel like I am home. But pathetic it is not. You have no idea what you are talking about.
As Draco and I sat down on the sofa facing our mothers, the two of them started to talk about the wedding, I could feel myself getting angry, I hadn't even said yes, actually I had said NO and here they are talking like we had half the wedding planned.
Of course. You need more reasons to whine.
I felt Draco squeeze my hand; he was telling me that everything would be alright. We started to talk about Quidditch; Draco was the Slytherin team's captain this year.
I like this school, for letting someone like Draco back after smuggling Death Eaters and almost killing their Headmaster.
And we all just sat like that for about an hour before Mr. Malfoy got up and said that it was time for them to take their leave. Draco gave me a reassuring hug before they left for he knew how awful the next two weeks would be for me.
After they left a house-elf announced that it was time for dinner. So the three of us went to the dining room where there was enough room to seat a tiny army. I didn't say much expect when they tried to get me to talk I would shoot daggers, just as well as any pureblood, if there was anything we were good at it was the cold-blooded looks.
The run-on sentences are kill- giving me a headache. I get really terse when I have a headache. For cold-blooded looks I will go visit a Yuang-Ti.
As I got up to leave I heard Mother say "Look [The Bride], don't think we are through discussing this, we will talk about it tomorrow."
I slowly turned around and gave them a look that had as much loathing as I could muster.
"All in all I gave less light than a burned-out light bulb."
For the first time in my life I saw my parents for what they really were. They were cowards as much as they were bullies. The only reason that they weren't physically or mentally abusing me is because they don't want me to be harmed for Voldemort, the Dark Lord can't have a bride that's brain dead or ugly, can he? In case you didn't know, the last part was dripping with sarcasm. My parents were the first to look away.
So you could not see that they were trying to hold in their laughter at your pathetic glowering at them.
I turned back around and made my way back to my bedroom. My room was the one place other then Hogwarts, which had my friends, where I could feel content. My mantra this summer had been 'you will be away soon, you will be away soon' the more time I was spending here, in this house, the more rage I was feeling. And I'm pretty sure repressed feelings were not good for my health
Give in to your anger. Come to the Dark Side. *Thinks * No, do not. We do not want whining Evil-lite.
Mini-snip. We jump two weeks, thus being spared her chronicled day-tday whining, and to the day she is going back to Hogwarts. Also snipped the obligatory clothes-scene. Why are mortal women so obsessed with clothes?
When I arrived at the station, I quickly made my way up to the train. I passed a couple of people that I knew kind of well and with those people you know how you have to stop and talk for a bit or else you are considered rude?
I have heard that is rude to whine to those you meet, yes. But do tell me, dear. I might even have a dagger to put you out of your misery.
Well yeah, I had to do that a couple of times. By the time I got to the train it was already time to broaden my horizons.. I looked to make sure Draco and the group wasn't still waiting. They know me too well to think that I would actually arrive early. I got on the train and started to look for the room that they would be in.
Just when I was about to look in our usual room that we had used since first year I felt a pair of hands cover my eyes and heard a voice say, "Guess who?" I turned around and grinned at the jet black haired girl with an amazing tan who had been my first lay and now my best friend at Hogwarts.
"Hey Scar!" Scar, or Scarlet Cobra, winked and gestured for me to follow her. Scar was wearing her black lace mini-skirt that I made a mental note to borrow and a backless white halter, with her 4-inch black stilettos.
See? More obsession with clothing.
There a couple of things you should know about Scarlet, only she can dress like that and get away with it. And with get away with it I mean, not look like a slut
Oh really? I wear it when I do want to look like a slut.
and also the teachers just don't say anything, well most of them don't. And those who do she gives her individuality speech that makes them wish that they didn't say anything.
First, contrary to popular belief, Good is not Stupid. Every demon who has ever run into a smart hero knows that. Second, McGonagall would not be impressed by your friend’s attitude. See one. She is not Stupid. Three, they are wishing that because of the complete and utter nonsense that your friend is spewing at that moment.
You know how Draco is the Prince of Slytherin? Well, Scarlet is like the queen. She's a little insane and very smart and nobody tells her what to do unless you, like me are one of her best friends.
"Alright [The Bride], here we are." I heard Scarlet say. I was about to say something when she continued to say "Yeah I know, it's not our usual place but Pansy was following Draco around like a lost puppy and she wouldn't leave us alone. Thankfully everyone else had already gotten here, so we told her to go save us a room and then when we were sure that we had lost her we found another room at the other end and took it."
I started laughing because at the end of this Scar gave me a sheepish smile and that is so not her, she actually looked a little ashamed of doing that.
The hussy does not know the meaning of the word shame. Neither do you.
I opened the door and saw everyone inside. The six of us have been together since the first year at Hogwarts. I sat down next to Zane Celt, a hot guy with light brown hair and a killer smile,
It rampaged and killed them
when the door was pulled open and there stood ...
Me. And Gimlet. Then they died.
Crossposted to![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-community.gif)
deleterius and _scourgify_
Story Or Series Title: A Bride for the Dark Lord
Fandom: Still no Harry, only an Heir to the throne of Whining.
Full Name (plus titles if any): ---. I shit you not. She is given no name. I’ll just call her the Bride.
Full Species(es): Mirror-Sue. She looks how you want her to look.
Hair Color (include adjectives): None given. So it’s blonde.
Eye Color (include adjectives): None given. So they’re blue.
Unusual Markings/Colorations: None given. A plate in her head. A bunch of annoying OC-friends.
Special Possessions (if any): None given. She can’t have that sword.
Annoying Origin: Two Death Eater parents, named ---.
Annoying Connections To Canon Characters: BFF with Draco. Has the Dark Lord propose to her.
Annoying Special Abilities: Lord V can’t get into her mind, and that has him puzzled. Potty-mouth.
Other Annoying Traits: Part of a pranking-ring at Slytherin. Snape does not approve. Pansy-bashing. Maintaining that she is not special, which usually means they are.
Please include a small sample of the worst of this story: I’m sorry, I can’t do this anymore. So I bribed Julia into having Yattara do it for me.
Yattara: "I will kill Julia for this."
Me: "You’ve been saying that for years. Get on with it. I need a break." *shoves Yatti into the fic.*
"Do not call me Yatti!"
I stuck out my tongue in a very childish gesture and before I could say anything a voice shouted up "Draco, honey, it's time to go so why don't you and [The Bride] come downstairs."
Even Malfoy's parents are afraid to speak her name.
I started to laugh hysterically. Draco stuck his tongue out at me just as I had a minute ago, yeah I know, we're real mature.
Mortals are weird. Mortal pairing rituals are even weirder. How do you survive as a species?
"Let's go, Drakie" I teased him.
"Whatever soon-to-be, Dark Lady." I made a face at the stupid title. As we quickly made our way down, with Draco filling me in on the whole Pansy situation and how his parents thought that she and him were perfect for each other and how if they and Pansy got their way that those two might actually have to get married.
I do not see how those two are not perfect for each other. He is arrogant, and so is she. What better way to be when you are better than the rest?
By the time we got into the den which was where our parents were, Draco had me in a much better mood.
"Hello Love" Mrs. Malfoy said as she gave me kisses on both cheeks.
Love, Dark Lady and [The Bride]. *shakes head.*
"Mister and Mrs. Malfoy, it is pleasure to see you again" I purred out.
I know what you're thinking, and yes I can be as much of a suck up as anyone else, and I do it even better then most.
I doubt that. Demons, those can suck up. You are a mere amateur.
Mr. Malfoy gave me a nod and continued to talk to my father in a very hushed tone. They were both sitting in the two chairs facing the fireplace having a conversation that looked like it was very important and in that case was probably something for Voldemort. You know, I have to face it... they have no other lives then their dear Lord Voldemort, it's pathetic when you get down to it.
Devotion to a highly intelligent, wrathful and powerful force of evil? I feel like I am home. But pathetic it is not. You have no idea what you are talking about.
As Draco and I sat down on the sofa facing our mothers, the two of them started to talk about the wedding, I could feel myself getting angry, I hadn't even said yes, actually I had said NO and here they are talking like we had half the wedding planned.
Of course. You need more reasons to whine.
I felt Draco squeeze my hand; he was telling me that everything would be alright. We started to talk about Quidditch; Draco was the Slytherin team's captain this year.
I like this school, for letting someone like Draco back after smuggling Death Eaters and almost killing their Headmaster.
And we all just sat like that for about an hour before Mr. Malfoy got up and said that it was time for them to take their leave. Draco gave me a reassuring hug before they left for he knew how awful the next two weeks would be for me.
After they left a house-elf announced that it was time for dinner. So the three of us went to the dining room where there was enough room to seat a tiny army. I didn't say much expect when they tried to get me to talk I would shoot daggers, just as well as any pureblood, if there was anything we were good at it was the cold-blooded looks.
The run-on sentences are kill- giving me a headache. I get really terse when I have a headache. For cold-blooded looks I will go visit a Yuang-Ti.
As I got up to leave I heard Mother say "Look [The Bride], don't think we are through discussing this, we will talk about it tomorrow."
I slowly turned around and gave them a look that had as much loathing as I could muster.
"All in all I gave less light than a burned-out light bulb."
For the first time in my life I saw my parents for what they really were. They were cowards as much as they were bullies. The only reason that they weren't physically or mentally abusing me is because they don't want me to be harmed for Voldemort, the Dark Lord can't have a bride that's brain dead or ugly, can he? In case you didn't know, the last part was dripping with sarcasm. My parents were the first to look away.
So you could not see that they were trying to hold in their laughter at your pathetic glowering at them.
I turned back around and made my way back to my bedroom. My room was the one place other then Hogwarts, which had my friends, where I could feel content. My mantra this summer had been 'you will be away soon, you will be away soon' the more time I was spending here, in this house, the more rage I was feeling. And I'm pretty sure repressed feelings were not good for my health
Give in to your anger. Come to the Dark Side. *Thinks * No, do not. We do not want whining Evil-lite.
Mini-snip. We jump two weeks, thus being spared her chronicled day-tday whining, and to the day she is going back to Hogwarts. Also snipped the obligatory clothes-scene. Why are mortal women so obsessed with clothes?
When I arrived at the station, I quickly made my way up to the train. I passed a couple of people that I knew kind of well and with those people you know how you have to stop and talk for a bit or else you are considered rude?
I have heard that is rude to whine to those you meet, yes. But do tell me, dear. I might even have a dagger to put you out of your misery.
Well yeah, I had to do that a couple of times. By the time I got to the train it was already time to broaden my horizons.. I looked to make sure Draco and the group wasn't still waiting. They know me too well to think that I would actually arrive early. I got on the train and started to look for the room that they would be in.
Just when I was about to look in our usual room that we had used since first year I felt a pair of hands cover my eyes and heard a voice say, "Guess who?" I turned around and grinned at the jet black haired girl with an amazing tan who had been my first lay and now my best friend at Hogwarts.
"Hey Scar!" Scar, or Scarlet Cobra, winked and gestured for me to follow her. Scar was wearing her black lace mini-skirt that I made a mental note to borrow and a backless white halter, with her 4-inch black stilettos.
See? More obsession with clothing.
There a couple of things you should know about Scarlet, only she can dress like that and get away with it. And with get away with it I mean, not look like a slut
Oh really? I wear it when I do want to look like a slut.
and also the teachers just don't say anything, well most of them don't. And those who do she gives her individuality speech that makes them wish that they didn't say anything.
First, contrary to popular belief, Good is not Stupid. Every demon who has ever run into a smart hero knows that. Second, McGonagall would not be impressed by your friend’s attitude. See one. She is not Stupid. Three, they are wishing that because of the complete and utter nonsense that your friend is spewing at that moment.
You know how Draco is the Prince of Slytherin? Well, Scarlet is like the queen. She's a little insane and very smart and nobody tells her what to do unless you, like me are one of her best friends.
"Alright [The Bride], here we are." I heard Scarlet say. I was about to say something when she continued to say "Yeah I know, it's not our usual place but Pansy was following Draco around like a lost puppy and she wouldn't leave us alone. Thankfully everyone else had already gotten here, so we told her to go save us a room and then when we were sure that we had lost her we found another room at the other end and took it."
I started laughing because at the end of this Scar gave me a sheepish smile and that is so not her, she actually looked a little ashamed of doing that.
The hussy does not know the meaning of the word shame. Neither do you.
I opened the door and saw everyone inside. The six of us have been together since the first year at Hogwarts. I sat down next to Zane Celt, a hot guy with light brown hair and a killer smile,
It rampaged and killed them
when the door was pulled open and there stood ...
Me. And Gimlet. Then they died.
Crossposted to
deleterius and _scourgify_
