
Right now, writing for me is a hard struggle. I don't ever seem to find the motivation for it, and the actual putting words on paper/the screen is like pulling teeth. It's hard, and I doubt just about every letter I write. So why do I write?
I get ideas, sure. I don't have the skills to pull any of them off right now, but the ideas are there. Even if they are blatantly cribbed from other sources (as I noticed again when I looked over my list of ideas for NaNo 2006). I keep investing in notebooks and pens, knowing I don't need special things to write. I just need paper and a pen, not a 15E-notebook and green pens. But I like the feeling of having something that is just for writing.
But am I writing in the hopes of getting published one day, or just so I can point to a large stack of manuscripts, which I can let other people read without embarrassment? I am very uncertain about what I want to accomplish, causing me to flounder in my writing. Hoot thinks I should just write for the sake of it, and I agree, but I still think I need a goal. Something to work towards. (After I beat my procrastination with a large stick, that is.)